Lockeford Meat & Sausage

Lockeford has a true wiener on its hands!

Lockeford Meat & Sausage
19775 N. Cotton Street
Lockeford, CA

With the exception of a handful of female college classmates I'd rather forget about, few can call themselves "sausage masters".

Lockeford Meat & Sausage is everything it should be: a purveyor of reasonably-priced high-quality meats displayed in a pristine glass case with product clearly marked to facilitate ease of browsing, ordering and payment.  Employees are helpful, willing to answer questions and happily offer cooking suggestions.

That being said, the meat, of course, is the star here.  Bacon, tri-tip and a variety of jerkies are available, but it'd be sheer blasphemy not to try the sausage.  From the moment I sank my teeth into my first bite of a Hawaiian Luau, my mind raced: Why haven't I tried this sooner?  Why is Lockeford so far from Elk Grove?  Where did these voices come from?


The casing provided a nice snap.  What followed was a taste explosion of sweet and savory, highlighted by the caramelization of what I assumed was pineapple juice combined with brown sugar.  Or, liquid heaven.

Either way, I dream about it quite often; and girls who attend 12 years of Catholic school are taught not to worship meat, if you catch my drift.

Mickey Fine Pharmacy & Grill

I needed the calcium.

Mickey Fine Pharmacy & Grill
433 Roxbury Drive
Beverly Hills, CA


Chili and a Chocolate Malt for breakfast.  Oh, yeah!

Mickey Fine claims to be "the only original pharmacy with a soda fountain in all of Los Angeles".  The Grill is located in the back of the pharmacy, and the pricing is impressive: a few bucks got me a generous cup of steaming-hot Chili, garnished with a precise amount of cheese and onions.  On the side, a Chocolate Malt...because that's how I judge the quality of soda fountains.  If you're lacking on the malt powder, you fail.

Mickey Fine earns an A+ in the Chocolate Malt department.  The A is for the rich, luscious ice cream and strong malt flavor, and the extra credit is for the leftover malt served on the side, enough for another person.

I left full and satisfied for less than ten bucks.  Where else is that possible in Beverly Hills?

Plainfield Station

Just use your GPS.  Trust me!

Plainfield Station
23944 County Road 98
Woodland, CA


Holy hell, this place is in the middle of nowhere.  Seriously.  If you were to give directions, it would go something like this: Go a block past the old lady selling cherries on the side of the road, hang a left at the third corn field (by the way, how can you tell where one corn field ends and another begins?), drive just past the second burned-down barn you see and hope to God you find the place before sundown.

The Pounder is no joke.  Before I ordered, the cook told me it's "a burger with two patties"...and I expected the typical stack of two thin patties on a regular old bun.  But, this burger was ENORMOUS. The patty was distinctively flavored and piled high with fresh, crunchy produce; the bun held up till the end without collapsing in a sad pile of disappointment. And steak fries on the side?  I thought I had died and gone to heaven.

Great tacos, too!

Friendly, unpretentious crowd...back-to-basics home cooking...can't go wrong here!

Madison Bear Garden

I can bear-ly contain myself!

Madison Bear Garden
316 W 2nd Street
Chico, CA


MBG has all the charm of a college Greek system hangout, but with some seriously awesome cuisine to back it up.

The ambience is LOUD, both visibly and audibly.  A giant statue reminiscent of Bob's Big Boy holds a burger and mug of Sierra Nevada and smiles as you make your way to the restrooms.  Chico State memorabilia hangs everywhere.  Several TV screens broadcast different games, and there are arcade games for both kids and adults who want to remain single for the rest of their lives.  Multiple bars.  Karaoke.  Dancing.  Pool tables.

All of that aside, the food is amazing.  The Thunder Humper may sound like a typical chili burger, but it's far from it.  The beanless chili is meaty, smoky and dark, as if it had been simmering for hours. Slop that over an open-faced burger, top with diced onions and finely shredded cheddar, and you'll have to force yourself to come up for air once you dive in.

Do yourself a favor and order the Onion Rings, if only to make use of the bottle of J. Lee Roy's Dippin' Sauce at your table.  The label states you can use it as a "buffet dip", whatever that is.  All I know is that the spicy, sweet, tangy sauce takes onion rings to the next level.